“Its just a red marvel” Gina said, as she kept putting away the boxes

“ twenty-four, twenty-five, twenty-...” whispered Todd for himself as he avoided the twenty-sixth tile in the floor, along with the thidteenth, the thirtyninth and the fifty second.

“It’s not just a red marvel, Gix” finally said Todd, after moving some invisible bodies of air around him

“Whatever... just help me move this boxes, will you?” said his tired sister

Twenty-seven, twenty-eight, twenty-nine, thirty, thirty-one, thirty-two, thirty-three, thirty-four, and so Todd started lifting the boxes into the attic, anyone would think that those fragile arms wouldn’t do the job, but he was not complaining. And they went on without talking, as he kept moving that little red marvel in patterned cycles around his fingers.

“You know you have to put that back once we’re done right?” Asked Gina, after lifting a big one, she had that expression which tells you that she knew exactly the answer, but yet she tried.

“Dad would’ve wanted me to have it” said Todd, almost whispering

“Dad would’ve want you to move on, and to remember him, as he is now, in the past, not to stick to some stupid toy” said Gina

“Shut up!” he shouted “Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!” he sistematically repeated

“Todd, I’m just worried about you, you haven’t cried ever since dad died, you haven’t called mom since the funeral, you are failing at school again!” said Gina

“The lady of the yellow dress, the lady of the yellow dress...” he went on, almost like chanting, he was interrupted when he accidently, or not, dropped the box.

“I’m sorry, i’m sorry, i’m sorry, i’m sorry” he said, as he kept lifting and droping the box three times.

“Its time for your pills” the two heard

“511, its time for you to wake up” said the voice

So he woke up, surrounded by an agitated nurse and security agents.




By I’m the penguin

Why to live? Why to breath? If at the end we shall all die. If so, it means the final goal is death, then why to keep inhaling? But then if the eternal rest is death, is life an infinite torment which we have to pay? And if reencarnation it is, then when does it stop? When does it begin? What is it?

Is the place where we all are our reality? Because we don’t even know if such thing as reality exists, maybe we are just the imagination of a wanderer, just a predetermined experiment. And it would be awful to think that you are something else, and all the world was just made for you, and that you are entirely alone.

But if we do live, then what are we? An animal with free will? Or just an abstract and etereous ilusion of a higher being? Then why shall we feel? Why shall we think? If we are so little in the whole, why were we given life, as a bless? Or as a curse?



the other [Mrs. Kite]

George and Mary Smith were a very normal couple, living in a pretty house, in the suburbs, nothing really happened around Menlove Avenue, same old neighbors, same old houses, same old ladies going by the street to church. But the Smiths had a secret, well, more than a secret they had a kid, not of their own. Eleven years ago, Mary had taken young John form her sister, who was a mess. John’s mother had now a new family, and his father was long gone, so John never really met his parents.

Around John Lemmon, many weird things happen, without him realizing he made them, things that annoyed his uncles, and thus the reason they had kept him, “a secret is such a horrible word” used to say Mary to George whenever they talked about this “I’d rather say we keep him safe from what the neighbors may think” she said. And to be fair she was right, some of the people around there would be annoyed by such oddness.

As Mary and George Smith had no other children, they had a hard time explaining sometimes the midnight wake ups, the cries, the toys all around the house, but those could be easily taken care of, the hard part came when the strange events began to happen, they could no longer blame cats, or babysitting for a distant friend, people began complaining, and Mary just started running out of bad TV stories.

The oddness all went to crazy one day, when John was at school, and he, accidently made a full display of his “strangeness”, causing all sorts of reactions, some were impressed, others were stunned, but mostly teachers were horrified. Once he got home, as always hiding in the back of the car, John told aunt Marry of what happened, for what she acted in a mad way. “How could this happen? We must hide you!” She just kept saying, as she carried John around the house looking a place to hide, when the door was knocked. “Its impossible, how could anyone know this fast?!” Marry said.

The door was knocked again, “It might be worse to make people wait” she thought, so she hid John inside the downstairs closet , and ran to the door, she didn’t knew what was more shocking, the height of the man, or the odd suit he was wearing.

“ ’ood aftern’n, m’am, me name iz Henrich Utzberg” said the tall man with an odd german accent .

“Goo…good afternoon, Mr Utnerd, ho..how can I help you?” asked the confused, scared woman

“Aim l’king fur a sm’ll kid, who I beli’v l’ves here” answered the gigantic man.

“Oh, that’s just silly, no kid lives here, everyone knows that, me and my husband could never have any kids” she answered in such a fake tone, that not even trying she could have repeated.

“Nai, nai, I so a kid ‘n thee local sch’l, I th’nk he’s j’st whut we arre l’king f’r” said the German.

John was really confused by all this, all his life he had been ashamed of whatever weird things happening around him, but someone wanted him because of that, he felt happy, but he couldn’t help to feel confused about why her aunt was hiding him, so in a rush he came out.

“here I am!” said John, he was not sure of what he just did, and the horror face of aunty Mimi didn’t help, but he saw an expression of satisfaction on the tall odd man in the door.

“Whut’s yar name?” asked the german

“I’m John, John Lemmon” he said, waiting for something magical to happen next

“John, th’s might s’nd add, but, all thee weird th’ngs th’t have happen’ to you, they arre all because’” he paused, Henrich and John's expression were of pure delight, while aunt Marry was feeling like the whole sky just cracked up

“John, you are… a musician” said the tall man “A r’ck musician” said the german with a smile on his face

By I'm the penguin

« Nous irons vivre libre
Dans un pays sauvage
Et nos armes seront
L’amour et le courage
Mon ami, n’aie pas peur
Je saurai te défendre
Et d’un bon coup de botte
Sonner les serpents à sonnette »

-M- et Arthur H

Nous irons vive libre ! Où ? On ne le sait pas encore…

And perhaps we’ll never ever know, but we’ll keep looking for that place, because finally that’s what gives us the thrill of life, some of us will make it, some of us won’t, mais, on ne le sait pas encore…

[only if you're intrested on the song: Est-ce Que Tu Aimes]

[Mrs K i t e ]

"Well, don't just stare at me, say something!" I say in my angry tone

You just stand up and walk to the window, you look at the city, there was something different on the sky lately, "probably the pollution" you think.

"I'm not sure what to say about this" You say, and even though you are confused, you knew this was coming a while ago.

"Right now the last thing we need is you shutting down yourself again" I say, I'm really desperate, I'm worried of what you may think, and it makes me angry to care for what you think, and I'm miserable because I care for you, but you remain silent.

"I'm sorry, but you've let me speechless, this is not just something you hear everyday, is not like you telling me today was bad at work, this is serious" You say, avoiding the answer, avoiding the expression, avoiding me.

"Say you're sad, say you're angry, for god sake SAY SOMETHING!. Or just be honest and tell me you just don't care" I knew that you would never tell me what you felt the moment i told you that, I knew I would never hear from you that it had hurt you.

"Do you really want to know what I feel? Do you? I don't know how to fucking feel! You want me to say that I'm impressed? that I'm confused? That you've just turn around my entire world?" You say, just not caring anymore about my feelings, I know you would rather jump out of the window than have this conversation, but i need an answer.

"You always turn this way, into defensive shit, and you just can't deal with simple conversation, just say it!" I yell, this is so us, not being able to talk, and that is so you just not being able to care.

"You're putting me in a freaking corner, I just can't deal with this right now, my mother just died for hell's sake, and now you expect me to handle this?" You take your jacket, you are in a rush, you open the door, you don't even look back.

I knew then that I would never see you again, I knew that this had ended us. I knew from the moment I told you, and it hurts, but I had to tell you, I had to say it.



By I'm the penguin

"He keeps scratching the aching leg, sir.” There was a long silence, “Doctor?...”
“Erm, yes, yes, of course, tell him to stop.”
“I already did, but he won’t stop, and the rash is getting worse.”
“Which patient?”
“511”
“Fifth floor?”
“Yes”
“Load him then.”
“All right Doctor.” said the nurse as she left, heading to the fifth floor.

As she arrived, she knocked on the room 511 though this was a pure formality since instantly after knocking, and without expecting an answer of any kind, she would open the door and follow the doctor’s orders. Only this didn’t happen, the door wasn’t locked, they couldn’t be locked, but this doesn’t mean you couldn’t block it, any patient with a piece of brain, could figure out that by moving the small table and positioning it in the right spot, you could avoid any door-related disturbance, at least for a while, before security showed up, and this tend to happen more than usual, specially in the fifth floor.

Of course, this nurse knew that, and almost with a trained reaction she went back a few doors until she reached the nurse’s station and paged a number she knew well.. “Security in 511” she said.

[Mrs K i t e ]

I wake up. I take a shower. I eat breakfast. I go to school. I fail a test. I play soccer. I get drunk. I graduate. I get wasted. I go to college. I study. I dream. I drink. I get high. I get laied. I study more. I drink more. I don't dream. I meet Kelly. Kelly meets me. I do Kelly. Kelly does me. I love Kelly. Kelly doesn't love me. I drop out. I work at a coffee shop. I quit. I plan. I fail. I meet Jean. Jean meets me. I like Jean. Jean loves me. I get married. I work at a departmental store. I make phone calls. I still make phone calls. I go to a funeral. I cry. I quit my job. Jean quits me. I cry. I work at a paper company. I get robbed. I buy a car. I get laid. I go to clubs. I get high. I read. I feel alone. I feel safe. I meet Lisa. Lisa meets me. I love Lisa. Lisa loves me. I feel happy. I have a dog. I get married. I have a child. I take Erick to school. I get robbed. Lisa dies. I cry.

And it hits me, none of this was ever real, none of this will ever be real, it hits me but I have always known, maybe all is just part of a twisted story in a cheap TV show. Maybe we all are characters in a novel, probably is just all a dream, it makes me feel nothing is real.


I don't exist.



By I'm the penguin

It’s one of those glances you get a Thursday afternoon, when everyone already left, and you’re all alone, sitting on the desk. You decide it’s late, and think about finishing the day after, so you get your things and leave, you see the janitor on your way out and you smile, knowing he still has a long night. Then as you walk to the subway you see some faces, most of them tired and as you take the stairs down, you see the sticky floor that characterizes these entrances, you take out ticket and wait for it to come, and it’s a lonely place right now, unlike the mornings. There’s a bright but dead light you tend to avoid, and you make a small movement of anxiety as you hear the railroad lines vibrating and that acute and long noise as the subway stops. You get in and sit on the first seat you see, your eyes are closing but you don’t want to miss your destiny. And as you look out of the window each time it stops, as the name of the station flashes, you wish it said “nowhere”.

[Mrs K i t e ]

They always come, they always do. I've had to deal with them since I got to this horrible place, I have never seen them and probably I never will. But yet every day I hear them, the other prisoners I mean. The old stone walls are thick but yet I hear their every word, always letting whispers of dark thoughts slide out of their intangible mouths, floating through the air, making it harder to breath, crawling into my ears.

"Kill you self" the say "You'll rot in this dungeon!"

At first they didn't get to me, but as days, months, years went by, the ideas of getting out were burning my every particle, out of here no matter how. I had to do something, I had to get out and explain all to Sylvia, I had to made up for all what I made her go trough, probably our son would be now grown up, mad at the father who he never had. But after all, she would must likely be away in some place not even God would know.

Despite of what everyone said, I knew I was innocent, the death of that poor girl had nothing to do with me, but I couldn't think of that, the death girl couldn't worry me any less, I just wanted it all to stop.

"You know you kill her, and you liked it"
"You just want to be out of here so you can do it again don't you? You bloody murderer"

The days just seemed to last years, but what was driving me mad was not any longer the imprisonment, but it was the whispers, they just kept going and going, like a cockroach inside my brain, crawling, with every of its little dirty paws, and i just wanted to smash it, to crush its head and stick its body with a needle until it could move no more and squeeze it and smack it and step on it and destroy its every bit, and.... but they just wouldn't stop.

"Think of the little girl, think of her, she'll never raise again"
"She had a future and you crushed it, and it felt good"

I had stopped wondering who might they be, it lacked of importance, I just wished they shouted up, I just wished they would end the torture, I just wished they died. But they don't, i don't know why they hate me, of why do they know these things, Probably they were the guards, making this more a living hell than it already was.


"Why did you killed the poor little thing?"
"You must end it, kill yourself, kill the murderer!"


"Do you think he's ever coming back?" Asked a pale woman, she looked as if she had cried for days
"I can't assure you anything Mrs. Green, but I believe not" said the man standing beside her
"But how could all this happen?" asked the sobbing woman.
"After all what happen, this was an expected outcome" he said, without any try of touch in his words
"But it was not his fault, right?" asked her
"That we will never know" said the man, just before walking trough the door and leaving.



By I'm the penguin

Then he saw the clock on the wall, and the ticking had became unbearable, second by second he kind of felt how life drifted, and how each drop of his wasted soul fell, crushing as crystal as they made the way into the floor.


[Mrs K i t e ]

some sort of self portrait was needed in a place to call home




By I'm the penguin

Scar [skahr]
\Scar\, n.
1. A mark made by a wound or ulcer, and remaining after the wound; a mark left by a previous injury; a blemish; a disfigurement.

Sou•ve•nir [soo-vuh-neer]
\Sou`ve*nir\, n.
1. That which serves as a reminder; a remembrancer; a memento; a keepsake.
2. A memory.

What about our past. It’s always there, one way or the other, and the common idea of “the past” is most of time ugly. Life ain’t easy, but even so, there are scars and souvenirs. So, scars where the ones which ached at a time, and they might still do, not because there’s still latent pain, but because of the fact that they are there, always, reminding you, disfiguring… Souvenirs, if you kept it, it might bring you back important memories, that someway or the other you want to have there, near.

Go back for a while, but don’t stay there, get here, get real, go on, feel free, and keep it up, we’re all scars and souvenirs.

[ Mrs K i t e ]

Would it be wrong to kill a person?

If that person is trying to kill your loved one.



Would it be wrong to steal?

If that something once belonged to you


Would it be correct to make love to your loved one?

If it happened to be married to your brother


Would it be correct to donate to charity?

If the source of this donation is crime



There is no such thing as a universal truth for the duty, and exerting a criteria from our liberty is what makes humanity so hard and complex.


Buttom line


think and reason


By I'm the penguin

Isn't it?
I'm also starting to think that I need a fix, but, hey!, that's just me, right? You tell me now ...

[Mrs. K i t e ]
[The celebrated Mrs. K. performs his feat on Saturday]

Sometimes, when I am wandering in the land of dreams, a place where nothing is real, i find my self in the moon, the mystic sphere in the sky with stars, like some sort of light show.

Just breathing the dark in its magic and all the shadows seem so far away, but so close i can hold them.

And in every of this journeys I walk towards a pair of brother trees, living in the moon as that, just there, part of it, part of me. And we are all together, as one.



By I'm the penguin

And so the next day, there was no advising, no surprise parties, instead, the willow dedicated to give away his belongings to everyone he knew, after giving his last windilopeg to the pink screw, and the only last red rose to the crow, and giving away all of its dear swelldos to all of the red oaks, he was done. Everyone had seemed to appreciate it, but none quiet understood what was happening, was the willow moving to another place? Was he clearing space for new things? None at the whole jungle could get it. No other person had ever done that.

"What's all this?" asked the fox
"Well i'm giving away some of my belongings" said the willow
"I know, i've noticed, but, why?" Asked the confused fox
"I just have to finish some businesses before I depart" said the willow in that determinant voice of his
"To where? are you leaving us? I don't understand"
"Its simple my time has came, I no longer want to keep going" said the willow
"Time to what?"
"To die"
"That's nonsence, trees can live forever" said the fox
"I just think it is time" said the willow
"So are you sure of this? because there is by definition no turning back"
"I couldn't say I am sure" said the now undecided tree

And so the days went by and the tree had not yet came to a final decision, but anyways, he had not seen the raven in a while. And in the days he thought a lot, about life and death, about existence and about purpose. "I have done all I can really do in life can't I?" he said to himself, to then answer "But if I'm still supposed to do more things?" And so he went on in an endless debate with himself.

And again in one of those nights were the moon only showed a single star, the raven appeared again, and this time the willow was ready, they stayed in silence for a long time, the only sound that could be lisented in the whole jungle was the one of the growing grasses.

"Are you ready to take it?" asked the raven in the same tone, as if he had asked him that all eternity.
"I want to live" said the willow
"But this is what you want, you called for it" said the raven
"But I didn't, I just want to be here, living" said the willow
"You have been here way too long " said the raven
"I feel like i still have things to do, time is not a problem"
"Time is not what i mean" said the confusing bird
"then what is you point? why do you say I want to die?"
"Simple, you have been around too long, you asked for this, i brought it to you"
"I never asked for this!"
"You say you want to live, you keep holding to that thought, but you stopped living a while ago"
"What do you mean? I am here ain't I?"
"Every living thing has a death wish, which they are all taught to fear, to avoid. But they all just hope for peace and rest" said the raven
"But, i'm alife, i'm here and I don't want to die" said the now terrified tree
"How can you be alife without death?"


By I'm the penguin

The raven repeated, “Death” with that passive tone of those who know.

The willow didn’t really know what to say, all this time giving advice, now was the time when he needed one. “Do I?” he told the raven.

“Yes” he answered, just as if he had been living in the willow’s thoughts all this time. The willow kept silent for a while, “And what is it that you want?” he finally said,

“It’s not about what I want really; it’s about what you want.”

“How come? You’ve just told me what I want”

“Indeed, though, I’m not talking about that, I can give you what you seek, but in order for me to do it you must really want it, entirely.” The willow got it, still it was something that worried him.

“Then, that’s impossible, you can’t really help me.” The raven knew that was about to come, so as if everything was planed the told him.

“Why is that?”

“Because even if what I seek is death, I’m not sure I want to die entirely I must sacrifice a part of what I want to get something else I also want, that’s the way it works. I’m really tired, I can’t really go on, I want to rest, but still, a part of me still has lots of things to do, that part wishes to live, so I can’t want it entirely,”

“That is what you need to do then.” The willow tried to believe in it, but he couldn’t, it was just not part of what he was. Then the raven said,

“Go on, end all this” and after a short silence he said, “I shall be back soon” and he flew away into the dark of the night.

The willow felt confused, he couldn’t really sleep that night as he thought what the raven had just told him. And he kept asking himself questions, and after the sleepless night he made a choice. He was going to leave. So he decided to settle thoughts down. He had a long list of things to arrange before his death, he worried about the jungle creatures, but he had to find a way. A way to settling everything up in order for him to leave.

Second Part
Mrs. K i t e
[ will i challenge the world today? ]

As you may have noticed my dearest stranger, the daily continuum was broken this sun, thus giving us two letters in one day, and so we shall make of this a special occasion.

We me, and Mrs. Kite, will show you a world in three scenes, first scene by me, second scene Mrs. Kite, and third, shall flow form the previous ones.

And so it starts.

It was the hottest day of winter, and the willow was really tired, he had had to listen to everyone's problems in the jungle, and advice them. But the problem really wasn't telling the penguin to stay away from the gorilla, or the dwarf to get a job, or tell the walrus to take easy the partying. The real problem is that he was exhaust, all those years had finally kicked in, a red oak had once told him that trees could live up the same forever, but boy was he wrong.

So the job wasn't really the hard part, as a matter of a fact he looked forward to advice all the people in the jungle, but then what as it? Was it because he was alone? " Never" he said himself always, "I am the less lonely person in the world, people always come to me, and I have made fantastic friends in these couple thousand years". And it was true, the willow was surrounded by caring people, who were nice to him.

"I guess you have grown to old and you need retirement" said one day the red color
"Well, i don't believe so, us trees, we age but our life extends as long as time itself, it is not the oldness" said the concerned willow
"The it most be that you need someone to advice you in your daily life, you always are helping this people, for once you should be the one talking" suggested the red color
"I guess, but I'm telling you now, and i still feel this, I'm tired, I just don't want to go any further" said a hopeless willow.

Soon the whole jungle knew he was down, and all joined and tried to help him, it was beautiful, the clouds came down and danced with the rain, the lions befriended the winds and roared happily together. Even the snakes got along with the fires, it was magical. But still the old willow had that feeling, like running ice knives through his every branch, making him weak, and sick. Not all the love of the flying ferrets could make him happy, nor the jokes of the two headed trawlt. He just couldn't feel it.

Everyone was worried about the willow, and soon the advising visits became surprise fests to make him better. But nothing they did seemed to get to him, and this worried everyone, because the willow was a really important member in that society. But he was just not himself anymore.

One of those moons where in the skies all you could see was a single star ,a white raven came to the willow.

"I know what you seek" said in a screetching tone.
"What? Who's there?" asked the awaken three
"I know what you seek, and I came to give it to you" repeated the raven.
"Who are you?" asked the confused willow
"I am he who has what you seek" said the raven.
"And what is that that i seek?" asked the curious willow
"That is death" said in a low tone.
"What?" he asked, even though it was the clearest thing he had ever heard.


First Part
By I'm the Penguin.

[Yes, there must be three parts]

One of those days where nothing seems normal, when all you want is to go home and sleep... That's when you say something just as whatever gets you trough the night, only, sometimes it must also take you through the day. With this lack of sleep or rest, one must find something else to get trough, even if it's just a thought, an image, a memory or a song... literally, whatever...
During this whole process you tell yourself, that this is the last time you'll ever get into something like this, and you really mean it but it is commonly full of bull... Because, then, two days have passed since the hard day's night, when suddenly you're looking at the bright side and you are telling yourself the opposite thing, "oh yes, it was worth it, lets do it again" just as if you where fooling yourself, and maybe you are, but there's no need to know.
And finally... you get back to the same old situation, and you realize you're into this cicle which might never end... It must be in everyone, we learn from our mistakes, but that doesn't mean we wont do them all over again, so, this said, is just like a reminder... with the vane hope that somehow i'll think about some other things before getting myself into the wheel, which as i said, might never ever end, because finally, it's what makes us be.



[ Mrs. K i t e ]

Dear Francis,

Today was a really uncomfortable day, it all started at school, Miss Green had let us play with clay, and it was really fun. I got to make a snow man with Matt, the boy I talked to you about the other day.

It was fun, I really like Matt, he is very funny and always makes me laugh. But then after Miss Green read us, we played with the toy box, as always I took the small pink squeeze ball, I just like it. But then out of the blue, Matt and Danny hit me with a ball, I didn’t fell or anything, but I was angry, why would Matt throw a ball at me?

Mommy always said to Lauren that when kids are little, they hit you because they like you, I guess Matt likes me too.

Then when I came home this afternoon, mommy prepared lunch and we played with Spot, and then as she always does, she asked me about my day.

“So how was school today honey?”

“Fine, I guess.”

And then the everlasting question, Until today I’m not really sure of why she keeps asking this every day, but she does.

“Did you make any sweethearts today?”

She used to ask Lauren that kind of stuff all the time, then they got all secretive and giggled, I never get it. What’s the big deal?

“Well there’s someone at class I like” I inexplicably said

“Oh, and who would that be?” she asked me eagerly

“No one really…” I suddenly got shy, I just wanted it to be, how is the word?... private?

“Oh, come on, if it is a special person to you, then I want to know who it is” said mom with a gigantic smile on her face.

“Well his name is Matt” I said

“Who?!” she asked, as if he hadn’t heard well

“Matt, the boy who lives in the blue house a few blocks away” I said, I was really surprised she didn’t remembered him.

“Matt Conrrad?!” Then mom had no longer that gigantic smile and she just said“Be sure to do your homework” And then as that she went upstairs.

I was really confused, was it about he living in a blue house? Was she just shocked of my crush? Probably she didn’t expected me to have one, but I have always been more of a grown up, no one at my class has a diary, and I have you Francis. Probably mom just needed some rest.

If this wasn’t enough you should have seen at dinner, when daddy came home, it was way weirder.

“Could you pass me the potato salad Laurie?”

“Yes dad, here” said my sister

“So how was school today?” dad asked me

“Umm.. fine” I said, remembering how did this conversation ended last time.

“So, I was told by a little bird that you like someone at school, is that right?” he said, with that pretended calmed tone he has.

“Mom!” I complained, I was angry, she had told him after walking away

“C’ommon, tell your old man about it”

“Ok… well his name is Matt… ” I said, and I regretted it because there was a huge silence.

“Matt?! As in Mathew Conrrad, what’s wrong..” Lauren was interrupted

“Laurie…, let’s see, do you like him like him, or are you just good friends?” asked dad, as if he wanted to know if I had killed the gold fish or not. I became really uncomfortable, what was so wrong about Matt? Were our parents mad to each other?

“Well, I don’t know, we’re good friends I guess” I said shyly

The rest of the dinner we remained silent, I really don’t know what had gotten into them Francis, I really don’t, I mean I had heard love was tough, but I always thought they were exaggerations, I just don’t know what is so wrong about liking someone.

P.S Spot is getting vaccine tomorrow so he’ll be away for the weekend.

Sincerely, Jonas

by: I'm the penguin

The war of ideas took place in my head today, aujourd’hui. It wasn’t new, it wasn’t even surprising, it just was… as it always is, but there was something different about today, something that made me think for a little longer, something that caused me an emotion similar to indifference mixed strongly with deep care… [ straight please! ] and then as I faced into that deep deep well, I decided not to go in.




Mrs. K i t e
[ will i challenge the world today? ]

It was late and I decided to go to the store, pick up a few things for dinner and breakfast, it was cold as it always is. I kind of hurried so they wouldn’t close, I wasn’t sure at what time did they, but eleven o’clock is quiet late for a local store to be opened.

So I put on coat, grabbed the keys and hurried, I thought of what would I specifically buy as I went down the stairs, it gave me quiet a few time since I live in the fifth floor.

Until I was out of the building I noticed I hadn’t brought my glasses, since I have nearsightedness, I thought they weren’t so necessary, the store was just two blocks away.

So I walked almost running, I almost tripped with the damned rain but yet I managed to get there, shocker, it was closed, I damned whoever owned that store, but anyways what would be one? I knew of a 24hour store a few blocks away but I wasn’t sure where was it, so I started walking slower since I didn’t have any time hurries, instead I jingled the list in my head and wandered the streets, that moment I wished I had brought my glasses, because I couldn’t really see anything but blurry shadows and a starless sky.

I got to a point where I wasn’t sure where I was, but after a couple of turns and returns I finally found the bloody store, so after repeating the list so much I just went there and grabbed the things I needed.

And just before I took some chips I noticed someone had been staring at me since the second I came in, it was a dark tall figure, with a long black coat, he certainly looked mysterious, not to mention criminal-like. I thought it wasn’t a big deal, maybe he was waiting ‘til I left to pick a dirty magazine or something, or maybe he was planning to rob the store. What if he was planning to assault me as soon as i went out of the store? What if he had followed me since I left the flat? What if he was some sort of twisted pervert? What if...

“Did you find everything you were looking for?”

“Excuse me? Oh right, yes, yes i did, thanks”

So I paid, I didn’t even checked the change, I was just in a hurry to leave since the person had just moved towards me, so I practically ran to the door and left, I seriously tought of running but I had completely forgot the way back, so I just walked fast to god knows where and I heard the store’s door closing a few meters away form me, I entered in panic, all my previous paranoia had had a reason to be, the person was after me, but what did he wanted? I certainly didn’t look wealthy, was I just some random victim? Was this part of some ridiculous joke of those crappy shows? Would my friends jump suddenly form the trash can laughing at me? Was this just some huge coincidence? I just knew that at this point I was scared.

I went on, I looked behind my shoulder, he was following me indeed, he had apparently bought something, maybe just to have some alibi, he made some sort of sign with his hand, probably checking his watch. I was scared to death, what if he wasn’t a thief? What if he was a serial killer? What if he was a rapist? What if it was all in my head, was I becoming loony? Maybe he just thought he new me and wanted to say hello, which ever I wasn’t planning o stop and ask.

I turned right and i still hear his steps, I turned left and i still could hear him, I crossed the street and seconds later he did too. My sight was poor and I was wanting to have my glasses more than ever in my life, but I just didn’t care anymore, I ran to some random direction, turned left and kept running till I found an alley, I entered, it was a death end, I was death, he was going to find me and god knows what would happen, so I though fast and hid behind a trash can. Never in my life had i heard my heart in such a way, i could feel it coming out of my chest, I was terrorized.

Would he kill me? Would it be fast? Would he torture me first? Wold anyone find my corpse ever? When would people know I was actually death and stop looking for me? Would someone notice I’m gone? Would people show up at my funeral? I was worried about my parents reaction when they heard their only son was brutally murdered.

I heard steps coming close, I was hopping he would just thought I kept going on the same street, but he stopped at the alley and coughed.

“Hey Robert” he said with a deep hoarse voice

Oh dearest lord, the killer knew my name, he was indeed a serial killer, he had probably studied me for Weeks, but how come did I not noticed? Why didn’t I brought my glasses? I wouldn’t even see the face of my own killer!

“Dearest lord, Robert, you made me run a long way, I have to catch my breath” he said and the he coughed

Now he was mad, i was sure he would torture me.

“You left two bags at the store, are you alright?” said with a deep horrible tone

I could see now, he was pretending to have a normal chat so if any witnesses they would though we actually knew each other, he was a damned professional!

“Robert, its me, Tim from accounting”

God i was going to die! I know no Tim from... wait.

“I didn’t named you out loud because of this bloody cough, my troath is soar” he said, then he coughed again.

“Good lord Robert, it seems you just saw a killer or something”

By I'm the penguin

Foreign, be welcome, today we shall begin the era of blogging, we shall share a piece of those tricky mazes, writing letters to the future, to your present. And so it begins the wandering trip to nowhere, to somewhere, to the abstract and the simplest thoughts. Be welcome stranger across the street, feel free to enter this huge cloud of ideas that might wet you somehow, it's our desire to express or bizarreness and share it. We’ve dedicated this place to thoughts, art, and stories. Blackbird Fields, we're in.